IMPORTANT - Change!

This has been coming for a few months now, the change I mean. I have always blogged over here at Blogger, I stumbled here when I started my first photography blog and then when my sister and I started our business together we blogged here. When I decided to start my very own personal blog, of course I didn't even think, here is where I stayed.

But over the last few months, there have been many glitches over here, that have made my writing more time consuming than it needs to be! Making it hard to upload photos, let alone actually publish a post. But today, I had enough when I logged into blogger and apparently I have no blogs on my reading list! I follow a few blogs religiously, so don't tell me I don't follow any blogs!

So a week or so ago, I got myself a Wordpress Blog and started to play around. Things aren't perfect and I know next to nothing, but I am willing to give it a red hot go. My blog is really basic, but I will build it up from there to be how I see it.

So for the bloggers who I follow, I have bookmarked you and will visit you each day for my updates!! But for those of you who follow me, bookmark me and head over and leave a comment on my new blog so that I know you have found me www.amumsreality.wordpress.com the best part about Word Press that I have found, is my ability to reply directly to comments (like a chat conversation).

So join me

Bel xx

My plan of attack!

I'm not doing this to fit into my wedding dress, no not at all, considering my major fitting is on Monday! I feel blah! I don't like how I feel, how I look in the mirror and how lazy I am. Something has to change. I need a different tack.

Last night it came to me, I'm a planner and a visual learner, so therefore I need to go forth and plan. In the darkness of my study, I made a grid, it started on Thursday (which is today) and goes for a week. I listed the exercise I planned to do for each day, had a box underneath which is blank for me to fill out the duration of time I did it for. Under that, I have another box, it's called "lame excuses", which, if I don't move at all that day, I have to write my reason why.....because indeed, it will be lame, and will seem even more so if it is written down there for me to see.

Then I hit the scales, I weighed myself (though I'm not overly fussed about this number) and then I measured myself too, which I will use as more of a guide for me. This also went on my little document, in black and white. And now it belongs on my fridge door. I also have one hanging in my office at work. Did I mention I also emailed it to a friend - I'll have to answer to her now too!

They say it takes 21 days to start a new habit, this is day one. I feel motivated in my tracksuit gear today. I'm looking forward to all I have planned.

Bel x

These are a few of my favorite things........(today anyway!)

1. My deep mist pillow spray from the Body Shop. I think it works, I can't be 100% sure, but it does make my pillow smell so dreamy. I have two bottles, one in my bedside table, and one in my toiletry bag for when I am away. Phoebe loves it too!

2. Stop! Cuddle time! Phoebe and I often sing this out to each other, and cuggle or huggle time, as we like to call it occurs. Special moments like these I treasure more while I am working so much.

3. Knowing that the 1st of December is right around the corner and the Christmas fun can begin! I have always loved Christmas but now that Phoebe is a little older and understands a bit more, I look forward to it even more.

4. A nice Smirnoff Black when I get home after a hard day at work! Even better when it is coupled with a hot bath!

5. Instagram! Although I'm a photographer, sometimes my camera is just too big and bulky to carry around with me. My iPhone however, is with me at all times. I'll make a photo book at the end of the year to show all the photos I have taken with it, or else, they are going to go to waste and some of the most memorable moments are on there.

6. Friends....some have been extra special this week, with lovely thoughts and gestures that have warmed my heart.

7. My Sister, who despite having her own little man to look after, managed to have Phoebe this week while her Nan and Aunty were away in Bali. You are awesome, and this should prove you are in fact a super Mum!!

What are a few of your favorite things?

Bel x

He has arrived!!

First of all, I would like to say how amazing I think Amazon is, from the moment I ordered my Elf on the Shelf, they estimated the arrival time to be between the 17th of November and the 1st of December. I checked his shipping status, it said he had arrived in the country 4 days earlier, and that the estimated time of arrival was the 17th of November. He arrived on my doorstep on the 17th of November, see, amazing!

I saw him sitting on my shoe rack, Phoebe didn't. I hurried him inside without her noticing and while she went to the toilet I quickly unwrapped him. I seriously think I am way more excited than she will be when she sees him. I wanted to show her that very moment, but with help from my friends, I've seen the error of my ways and have decided he shall re-arrive on our doorstep from Santa the night before the 1st of December. He was also a lot bigger than I expected (I hear the internet can make you look smaller, lol!).

A few of my friends have now ordered their own, some which their kids were now younger. I have sooooo many plans for him!! When he arrives, we have to name him online and adopt him (I hope his name is not Riley, Phoebe has named every doll in this house Riley). Then, each day he looks over her from somewhere in the house. At night, he returns to the North Pole to report back to Santa. But best of all, he can't be touched, it may take away his magic and he might not be able to return!

Thanks to Pinterest again, I have so many fun things I can and am going to do with our little guy each morning. I don't know really who is going to be having more fun, Phoebe or I! I love Christmas, and now it is going to be a little more fun and special with this new tradition we are about to begin. Stay tuned from December when I start to blog about his adventures at our house!

Have you got a family Christmas tradition?

Bel x

Family

It's been a busy few weeks, that's why I haven't written so much, between work, after hours work commitments and dance rehearsals for Phoebe, not to mention preparing for Christmas, it's been a little crazy here!

I've wanted to write, I just haven't found the time (ok, a bit of laziness too). But today I want to write about family. There are days when I just think about mine and realise how truly blessed we are to have ours very close to us. My Mum lives in the same town, a quick drive from here, my sister and her family I can walk to in 20 minutes, and Michael's family (which is quite large, seven siblings and one neice in total) also live a short walk away. My Dad and his wife are the only ones that are far, but Skype helps that, ahhh the technology!

When Phoebe was young I always had the support of my sister and also my great ex-next door neighbor (not sure she really knows how much she helped me), not to mention our close network of friends. You know, those crap days, where your baby is crying and your at our whits end and start crying yourself, who do you call? I used to call my sister. But if she wasn't around, I had so many other people to back me up, to come running to the rescue and give me a break.

As soon as I returned to work, well even when Phoebe was just a seed in our minds, we knew we wouldn't have to worry about childcare, Phoebe is lucky enough to be looked after by her Nan and her Aunty. For this, we are so grateful, it is peace of mind for us. We really are lucky! On Wednesday nights her Aunties take her to watch netball, and she is often on sleepovers too.

I know we are lucky, blessed, whatever you'd like to call it, but the last few weeks and it has really been cemented for me. So many people around me either don't have their families closer don't have them at all, some are completely supportive and helpful, others not so much. So I will continue to not take how lucky we are to have a supportive family living so close by!!

Bel x

Don't panic! It might not be a panic attack!

It was years ago that I had my first real panic attack and knew that that was what it actually was. When I have one, even to this day, I get butterflies in my stomach, I tend to get diarrhea (sorry to be graphic but that is my main symptom) which then leads to the cause of my panic .... I would much rather stay at home for fear of embarrassing myself, having to go to the toilet in public (because no one does that do they - see irrational fear!), or being stuck in the car and needing to go to the toilet (which does happen but of course I have never had an accident - which is another fear). When having a panic attack, I let the people around me know by telling them "I'm feeling sick", it's kind of my code word!

But in the last few months I have noticed something different, a key, a clue to some of my panic attacks. So I started my own little experiment to see if I could be right and then of course I saw my Doctor and presented my evidence.

It turns out now, that after all this time, I have figured out that even though I am not Coeliac, I do in fact have an intolerance to wheat. Because wheat is a main staple in ones diet, especially mine, this would then lead to bloating, an upset belly and then of course, the immediate need to go to the loo - which drum roll please, would activate said panic attacks!

Since I have discovered this little key, I can say that I still suffer from the occasional panic attack but I have diminished them by 3/4's!! I even managed a three hour drive to Echuca the

other week, with no medication for my panic attacks and no Imodium (to stop you know what!).

I am still on the path of discovery, one step at a time. What things I can eat and how much (for instance I know I can have a bowl of pasta for dinner but if I have the leftovers for lunch the next day, I am in strife). I am trying to find a bread that I can eat, that is my goal at the moment.

Does anyone know of a good bread or of anything else good to eat?

Bel x

Minor freak out!

There will be no pictures with this post today, because I'm having a minor wedding freak out!! I know I am pretty organized, so that's why I am saying "minor" freak out. It's just because the wedding is in March, I want a lot of things done before Christmas hits!

Almost a year and a half before the big day, we'd already booked the place, the time, the photographer, the celebrant and the caterer! Not to mention I found a dress I loved (freak out one - I hope it still fits!). So yeah, I am organised, mostly.

So today, when I started making a bit of a list, I started my freak out. I think it is probably more because I am working full-time this term and don't have the extra couple of days to do things. That coupled with the fact that every weekend until Christmas is now taken up with parties, birthdays and other catch ups.

So I guess I just need to breathe and start crossing things slowly off the list. I know it will all be fine in the end, and I swear I have been an awesome bride until this point, no fuss what so ever. So off I go, have a bit of online shopping to do!

Surely I'm not the only bride to have a minor freak out!?

Bel x

Who's got mail?

Mumvember continues for me this month, some days it's little activities or tasks to do with Phoebe (and that I can take photo's of) and other days it's more about planning. Either way, I am really enjoy it all.

* Day 8 - leave your kids a love note.

I loved this one, because each night when we get home and check the mailbox, Phoebe is so disappointed that there is nothing in there for her. On her birthday when there was a card addressed to her, she actually cried, yep my three year cried tears of joy! So knowing how much she loves to get mail, I wrote her a quick letter in the morning and placed it in the letter box before we left without her seeing. When we arrived home, there was of course the obligatory bill or two, but underneath it all, her name scrawled on an envelope which she recognized.

Her Aunty (who was waiting at our doorstep), read the letter to her. It wasn't long, it just told her how much I love her and how much I can't wait for the holidays so we can spend lots of time together. It wasn't much, but I think it made her day. I'm going to try and do it more often.

* Day 9 - make a date with yourself

For this I plan to go on a whole day of shopping on Saturday, kid free. Granted, it will be to finish the Christmas shopping, but I am going to dawdle a little and have a leisurely lunch.

Who stole my motivation??

Four months until the wedding week!! You would think that would be enough to get my arse into gear and start moving a bit more. I seriously lack motivation! I love the thought of exercising but actually getting to do it is a different story. I have many reasons, I suppose you could call them excuses, or maybe that's what I should start calling them!

I started working out in the mornings before work and before Phoebe wakes (yes I am finally using her real name!), doing the Michelle Bridge's DVD's which I LOVE, but I find in the mornings, my asthma is already playing up, so I can't really perform to my best and honestly struggle.

Now that I am working full- time, as soon as I arrive home from meetings, I do the washing, tidy the house all the while trying to spend time with Phoebe. I could go for a walk then, but I am scared of getting swooped (I have a terrible fear of birds).

Then I was thinking I could use lunch times at work, but two of them I have yard duty which leaves a measly fifteen minutes to eat. And on the other days, if it rains or it is too hot, I have to be around to take my class.

......Amongst all my EXCUSES, I want to feel good and look good in time for my wedding but also for myself. Since having Phoebe, my body has changed DRAMATICALLY and I don't have even a quarter of the body confidence I used to. No tight clothes here anymore!

So I ask, what can I do to motivate myself, when can I do my workouts.....I want to hear other's experiences?? Hopefully through you, I can improve and have someone else to answer too!

Bel x (Yes, I have started using my name too).

Images are from my Pinterest board "Move it!"

My house annoys the crap out of me!

I have these moments in my everyday day life, where the walls of my house seem to creep in on me or I get the feeling that they are. My home will annoy me, the clutter, the toys, the lack of storage and the tiny spaces. It's hard to explain the feeling, but sometimes I feel like I can't breathe, I need to be in the open, where the trees sway and the air is fresh and clean. And then I visit friends houses and the problem seems to be compounded, beautiful furniture, large open spaces, clean and crisp design.

So I day dream of having a slightly larger house on a small property, nothing too extreme. Where I could start from scratch and really think about our furniture choices and layouts of the rooms. Of a beautiful veggie patch out the back for V and P to grow things in, and some chooks to to lay our eggs. But at the end of the day, unless I win Tattslotto, that 'aint going to happen.

Then reality kicks in, I do love our 13 square home that we built (lets face it, I don't want to have more to clean!), I love our location, I love that our friends and family are so close and that we

are in a quiet Court. We do have a small veggie patch in the yard, and our garden is lush with beautiful trees, I just need to use that as my escape into fresh air. And let's face it, although we could afford a bigger mortgage for that bigger house, it would mean no camping trips and no caravan at the beach!

*Our little Herb Garden.

So instead of dreaming (ok, I'll admit, I will still dream of winning the lotto, but then again who doesn't?) I clean, I reorganize and I think about how I can make things more comfortable for us and so that I can breathe. I'll make a list of the things that I could do/buy to make things better.

*Part of our backyard (including kids toys!).

1. I would like a smaller dining table, ours sits eight and is a huge rectangular hunk of wood, I would rather a square one that seats 6.

2. Some new light fittings would be nice, we still have the crappy ones from the day we moved in.

3. A new oven would be lovely too!

4. Declutter all rooms!

5. Get rid of some of the furniture in P's room, it makes it seem even smaller!

5. Use some of the ideas I have gathered from Pinterest for storage ideas, like this, so simple and easy but yet so great:

More here

Is it just me that gets this feeling? I feel a little crazy about it some times!

Bx

Catch up...

I need to catch up on my last few Mumvember days!

*Bake something.

*Steal a kiss while your baby is sleeping.

*Tell you Mum you care

*Feel good Monday.

1. So due to working full-time this term, I don't really have the luxury to bake as much as I used to (or at all depending on how busy the week!). Last week was a little too hectic, with finishing our long weekend away, catching up on washing and housework and then of course returning to work. So I missed Mumvember this day!

2. I always steal kisses from P while she is sleeping, especially in the afternoons if I lay down beside her for a few minutes. I love to watch her sleep, the soft flicker of her eyelashes and that moment where she looses her dummy because she is in such a deep sleep!

3. Most nights Mum calls or I call her, so this one was easy! It's funny that we do this considering we still live in the same town and see each other at least once or twice a week. We

always end our conversations the same way "Love you bye!".

4. Monday, oh Mondays! I was awake well before my alarm this morning (so I'm a tad grumpy!), so feeling quite tired. However, I put on one of my fave maxi-dresses from Just Jeans, put some lip gloss on and even put a nice bow in my hair to make myself feel a little prettier than normal!

More Mumvember to come during the week and I promise next time, pretty pictures too!

Lets not pretend

Being a Mum is seriously one of the single best things I have ever done in my life and continue to do! But lets not pretend people, amongst all those great days with our beautiful kids, the fun activities, the outings, the love and hugs, there are in fact some pretty crappy days.

Some people seem to hide these days, I'm not sure for what benefit, maybe they think no one else has them and they will be looked at weirdly, or maybe they like to keep up a pretty facade. I have never hid the numerous crappy days I've had with P from any of my friends or family.... for the simple fact that if someone finds themselves in my shoes, remembering back to the crappy day I had, might make them feel a little bit ok with it and help them get on with the day!

Like three weeks after I had been home, struggling with breastfeeding, and my panic attacks were creeping back in (another story completely), I had a group of close friends over from work. I didn't hide the fact that I was distraught that my little girl wouldn't eat, or that I in fact may have to turn to bottle feeding (which I was terrified about what others may think). Instead I cried, I sobbed and told them "It's not all roses girls, I'm a true friend, I'll show you the bad days too". And with that came support, support when I did in fact have to put my girl on the bottle (friends who tried so hard and in the end just couldn't continue, friends that persisted and managed to breastfeed for months to come, so many stories of struggle!). And since then, some of the girls that were in my lounge that day, when they had their own babies, did think back to that day and were able to find comfort in it and even have a laugh.

So let's not pretend to others, instead lets ask for help if we need it, share the bad days (as we'll find so many commonalities it'll actually be funny!), take a break when you know you need it, and make light of a bad situation! Many of us appear to our friends and family as Super Mum's, when in fact we all are!! But occasionally our capes need a wash, so lets not hide that fact!

Bx

Day 3 of Mumvember

*Take ten minutes for yourself!

I thoroughly enjoyed this one! Thursday's are crazy for me at the moment while I am working full time this term. I rush from work to pick P up from Dancing, head home and get dinner ready (which I now order from the school canteen and just heat up, delish!!). Then rush off to swimming, come home and then bed!

So last night, I decided, for the first time ever, to miss swimming and leave it up to hubby-to-be! Instead, I stayed at home, ran a hot bath, caught up on some Blog reading and read some of my book. I can honestly tell you, I can't remember the last time I did this without hearing TV's in the background, P screaming round the house or throwing toys in the bath with me. Tonight, I could actually here the birds chirping in the yard!!

I wont be blowing swimming off regularly, I like watching P, instead, I think I will try and have a bath once a week and just shut the door!

Bx

P

Miss Organised went missing!

For those of you who don't know me well enough, I am one super organised chick. In every aspect of my life, it shines through. It means things are done long before they should be, I arrive early everywhere and it allows for some down time.

Packing for camping trips is by no means an exception! Our first camping trip with P involved packing for all conditions and of course the many 'what ifs'! She was only a few months old, so I needed to be prepared for any situation that may arise. As the years have gone on though, I am mastering the art of packing lighter, but still for any which weather condition or outing that may arise.

This weekend though, something disastrous happened! On our first trip away in the new Van, excitement got the better of me. Miles from home, with one tired girl in the back seat, she asked for him, she asked for Sniffy. Her little rag of yellow satin with a bunny head, he goes everywhere she does, but most importantly he takes her off to bed. Holy crap, for the first time ever I left him at home!! Tears streamed down her face as I told her "He's at home looking after the house while we were away". She was strong, but come night time, our good sleeper was unsettled.

*P with her new Bunny Caravan Sniffy*

The next morning I ventured out and found a caravan Sniffy, one that would stay there even when we weren't camping. She loved him as much as old Sniffy and he helped her sleep. But she never once forgot old Sniffy and he was the first thing she sort out when she arrived home.

So despite my super organisational skills, I need to remember things can still go wrong!

Bx

Your wine is my vodka, don't judge!

I read somewhere the other day that the average two to three year old asks on average 400 questions a day. So now when P asks yet another random or pointless question, for reasons only know to her, I try to think of this! (Her most classic was "Why should I have to wear pants? Chipmunks don't!").

But some days, thinking of that fact, or taking a deep breath or even answering in my head "I don't bloody know!" just doesn't seem to cut it. Sometimes I will have a vodka with dinner and that will help me unwind and do the trick!

Most people have a nice white or red with dinner most nights, that is, of course, completely acceptable and almost very adult like. I can't drink the stuff, it tastes like cats pee (of course, I don't know that for a fact, but that's what I think it may taste like). I have suffered with migraines since I was 12, I've dealt with them for most of my adult life, and after many years of migraines (I never got a hangover, I got these instead), I realized that vodka and o.j is the only drink that leaves me migraine free.

So before you judge the girl sitting at the table near you in a restaurant who just ordered something other than the acceptable wine to have with her meal, don't judge, take a moment..... that girl is probably me, she's probably answered 400 why questions that very day, she probably just wants to enjoy her meal in peace with a drink that wont give her a migraine. All so that tomorrow she can do it all again and answer the 400 questions that her daughter will dish out.

What's your drink of choice?

B x